Author Topic: What Are the Different Types of Relationships? (Part 1 Mono, Poly, Open & Play)  (Read 805 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Master Graves

  • Administrator
  • Posting (Allowed)


  • Offline
  • *****
  • Lord Master

  • 16
  • Love:
    +0/-0
  • Personal Text
    Master of Myself before all others!
    • The House of Graves
  • Gender:: Male
  • Sexual Orientation: Straight
  • Role:: Master
  • How Active Are You:: I Live The Lifestyle When I Can
What Are the Different Types of Relationships?
(Part 1: Monogamy, Polyamorous, Open and Play Partners)

In this article, I am going to describe the differences and similarities between Monogamy, Open, Polyamorous, and “Play Partner” Relationships.  And there is a huge difference between them all.  I will also include a section on how the Dom/sub, Owner/pet, & Master/slave Dynamics can fit into these types of relationships.

I will be doing this in a format to make it as simple as I can to understand for everyone, without treating you all like you are stupid or talking down to you. The format is simple: This: Described: Pros: Cons: Different from A/B/C: Similar to A/B/C. You will notice a bit of repeating here and there as Pros for one are similar to a Pros for another, or the Pros of one are the Cons of another, etc. But I will try and limit the repeating as much as possible.

---

Monogamy: (Mono) The most common relationship in the world. Simply a one on one relationship, with full and complete loyalty to each other. No other partners, sexual or otherwise, are included in the relationship any further than friendships.
Pros:
   Only one person to pay attention to and consider in your daily life. Which does make things easier for you and your partner to keep each other happy and content.
Cons:
   Chances are, not all of your needs can be met by only one person. If they are or not, a danger still can arise of things becoming boring and stagnant. Unless Deep Love exists in this relationship, it has a high chance of failure these days.
Differences:
   Poly: In a Poly there is more than one person to consider and pay attention to. And everyone needs to pay equal amount of attention to all others in the Poly.
   Open: In an Open Relationship, you have one or more other partners, but most times you do not share them with the person you are in a relationship with.
   Playmates: Playmates are other people who are not in your relationship, and usually require permission from your partner to play with them. These are usually non-romantic, can be a onetime thing, or an ongoing arrangement.
Similarities:    
   Poly: None, other than simple relationship basics.
   Open: None, other than simple relationship basics.
   Playmates: None, other than simple relationship basics.

---

Polyamorous Relationships: (Poly) Simply put, a multi-person relationship, in which all partners care about each other, equally, and usually in a romantic way. These can include any combination of men and women (or other), even if those of the same sex are not “into” doing certain things with the others. You do not have to be Bi or even Heteroflexible to be in a Poly with members of the same sex included. But it does help. It is, however, possible to have both an Open and a Poly relationship, although rare due to obvious difficulties. Usually, both types of relationships pair best with Play Partners.
Pros:
   In a Poly you are more likely to find, and have fulfilled, all of your needs at all times. If one is at work, another might be available. If one is against feeling pain, another maybe be a masochist. If you are Bi, then having both a woman and a man around is best. This also gives you more people to talk to about problems and issues you may have, both inside and outside of the relationship.
Cons:
   You have to be very careful in selecting your Poly Partners, a bad seed can break apart the entire group. Also everyone in the current Poly must all agree and be able to have or develop feelings for the new person. You also have to be very careful that each of you spend equal time with each of the others, individually as well as in a group. It can provide scheduling problems, and be difficult to keep everyone happy with everyone else sometimes. Occasionally, if one part of the Poly breaks up, it can cause a cascade effect and break up the entire group.
Differences:
   Mono: You have only one partner.
   Open: Biggest difference here is that in an Open, your partner usually does not share your other partners with you, and you rarely share theirs with them. And you both rarely share any romantic attachments to the others partners.
   Playmates: This is the same an Open, but without any real romantic attachments. Also, it is pretty even if your partner joins you or not. Each time is usually a separate encounter and not part of an ongoing arrangement.
Similarities:
   Mono: None, other than simple relationship basics.
   Open: Is very much identical to a Poly, and they are often confused together. The difference being they are all separate relationships. But the basics are the same in regards to needs, people to talk to, and the requirements to spend equal time with all of your partners.
   Playmates: This is very different, and the only real similarity is having multiple partners. As each relationship is basically a onetime thing, even if it repeats or even if it repeats regularly, paying equal attention does not apply, as long as you are paying enough attention to your Partner.

---

Open Relationships: (Open) Basically, a Poly without the group dynamic. Sometimes permission and approval has to be given before a new relationship can begin outside the main one. Other times permission isn’t needed, as long as you are careful and always return home to the one you started with at the end of the day. Equal attention must be given to all of your partners, and most times these are romantic and long term relationships. The difference is that your partner does not share your feelings for your other partners, it’s rare that you all will live together, and each paring is separate. It is, however, possible to have both an Open and a Poly relationship, although rare due to obvious difficulties. Usually, both types of relationships pair best with Play Partners.
Pros:
   The same as Poly for the most part. If one relationship breaks up, the others usually stay intact. And without everyone living together, it can create a happier and calmer home life, as well as affording you space of your own. Changes in scenery from person to person also helps to keep the relationships active and fun, and helps prevent any relationship from becoming stagnate.
Cons:
   Much the same as a Poly, you also have to be very careful that each of you spend equal time with each of the others you have a relationship with. It can provide scheduling problems, and be difficult to keep everyone happy sometimes. You also run a higher risk of getting and spreading diseases if you are not careful.
Differences:
   Mono: You have only one partner.
   Poly: Biggest difference here is that in a Poly, your partners share your other partners with you. And all of you share your romantic attachments to the others partners.
   Playmates: This is the same thing as Open really, but without any real romantic attachments. Also, it is pretty even if your partner joins you or not. Each time is usually a separate encounter and not part of an ongoing arrangement.
Similarities:
   Mono: None, other than simple relationship basics.
   Poly: Is very much identical to an Open, and they are often confused together. The difference being that all people are part of the same relationship with each other. But the basics are the same in regards to needs, people to talk to, and the requirements to spend equal time with all of your partners.
   Playmates: This is very different, and the only real similarity is having multiple partners. As each relationship is basically a onetime thing, even if it repeats or even if it repeats regularly, paying equal attention does not apply, as long as you are paying enough attention to your Partner.

---

Play Partners: (Playmates) This is the easiest to describe of all of them. Simply put, this style of relationship is nothing more than two, or more, people choosing each other to ‘play’ with. There is never more than friendship between them, and sometimes not even that, although I don’t recommend it. Just people who want to have fun with each other for a specified time. The type of fun is up to those involved and can range from modeling for an artist/photographer, being a rope bottom for a Rigger, Sadomasochism, sexual dominance, or whatever. Usually these are one time things, or randomly repeating with no plans and usually are a spur of the moment choice. Sometimes these can be an arrangement to happen on regular intervals.
Pros:
   No one and nothing to consider except for the current situation and people. Unless you have another type of relationship that requires approval or permission to engage in this.
Cons:
   No sense of permanency or romantic involvement. It is also easy to develop feeling for the other person that are often not returned.
Differences:
   Mono: You have only one partner.
   Poly: No real relationship outside friendship. Usually only one person at a time, and usually only for now. Rarely a group dynamic, and when there is, it is brief and temporary.
   Open: If an arrangement has not been made for regular sessions, it is a onetime thing, or random when you both happen to feel like it.
Similarities:
   Mono: None at all.
   Poly: Only that you can have several play partners.
   Open: If an arrangement has been made, these are very much alike, save that there is usually no romantic connections.

---

How does a D/s, M/s, O/p Relationship fit into all this?

As far as types of relationships go, these are a separate entity entirely, and deserve their own article. Which I will write at some point in the future. But for the sake of completeness in this article, I will say a bit about them. We will just use ‘D/s’ from here on out for simplicities sake, but I am referring to all of them at once, unless otherwise noted.

Most D/s relationships fall under the Open or Playmate styles of relationships. They can include a romantic element, but many times fall under the simple love of a Dominant for his submissive. That being said, if a romantic element is involved, they can fall under the Poly or Open styles of relationships, and many are under Monogamy. The various styles of relationships can all contain a D/s dynamic. But special considerations must be made in these situations.

Monogamy: No real considerations, outside the normal relationship ones, are needed for this style of relationship.

Polyamorous: As this is a group dynamic, considerations must be made to who can and cannot order a particular submissive around and how far can those orders go for those who are not the direct Owner of that sub. More advantageously, you can say that all Dominants in the group have the same rights and abilities to every submissive in the group. Being more advantageous as this may be, however, is not always a good thing to do. Many, if not most, submissives prefer to have only one Owner. So special considerations need to be made in a Poly if it contains several Doms and subs. This can take a lot of talking, planning, rule setting, and other detailed things to make sure everything works out.

I will add this, that it is my opinion that this is likely the most rewarding type of relationship, if you can make the D/s dynamics work together properly. Which takes a great deal of loyalty, respect, and trust to accomplish. I will also say that it is the hardest to maintain, and all members of the Poly have to work on it constantly to keep it working.

Open Relationship: The D/s dynamic here is fairly identical to Monogamy. The one difference here is this: Many subs are not always happy to share their Dom. In this style of relationship, you have to keep a very close eye on the limits, likes and dislikes of all your subs, to be sure you do not cross a line with any of them by trying to bring the wrong two of them together. However, this is basically the only real consideration, you need to worry about other than the typical things for an Open Relationship.

Play Partners: This is likely one of the more common styles of D/s relationships, and requires no real considerations outside the normal. Save again, some subs don’t like sharing their Owners.

In short, the biggest style of relationship with the most considerations would be Poly, closely followed by Open, then Playmates and finally Monogamy.

---
-Master Vic Graves
March 14th 2016 10:00pm

« Last Edit: March 14, 2016, 10:11:48 PM by Master Graves »
Lord Master Vic Graves
Head of Household at The House of Graves
Husband, Owner, & Mentor of Lady Diana